Maybe I'm Really Getting Going?

So now I have a whopping 2 days in a row of gym attendance under my belt. It's a start, right?

Nicole, if you are still reading, you are awesome in your dedication to the gym and quite an inspiration. In fact, knowing that you are now 5K wise, do you have plans to do the Dana Point Turkey Trot? I do, since we will be in OC for Thanksgiving this year!

I've been doing much better with sticking to my points the past couple of days as well. My efforts have also led to me having a bit less anxiety . . . go figure!

Today I was in a rush to leave the house to go to my acupuncture appointment, but I still needed to have lunch. My lunch was even planned. However, when I was ready to assemble my lunch I found that all of the salad mixes were too old to be edible and my strawberries weren't looking to lively. I quickly made use of a pretty new head of iceberg, which isn't my favorite for salads and I was able to salvage some strawberry slices.

Look at my salad!

Besides the lettuce and strawberries it also had grilled chicken (courtesy of the frozen food section of Trader Joes, and pre-cooked no less!), feta, and walnuts. I also made a really tasty dressing for it. Yum! You've all pretty much seen me in action . . . . I'm really not so much a salad girl. I need (read: WANT) my carbs with every meal. This salad was so wonderful that while I was out today I got fresh strawberries and salad mix so that I am better prepared for tomorrow.

Anyhow, I finally did make it to my acupuncture appointment. Usually my pulses are "deep" and "tight" which in TCM generally means that I am a stressed out basket case. But today? They were "warm" and "shallow" but very strong, indicating that I am pretty balanced. Also, he feels that I will be ovulating soon, not that I asked.

Bottom line . . . I'm feeling pretty good!

Tara and Stacy, thanks so much for your support and helpful tips, I really appreciate it!

Small Steps

Well, yesterday did get a bit better. I followed thru on my lunch plan and didn't stray one little bit. In the afternoon I took Andy over to the gym and got him signed up for child care. He also spent a bit of time playing, or, in reality, being manhandled by the bigger kids. When Brian got home we had dinner well within points for everyone. In fact, later in the evening when Brian offered me dessert I turned it down. He was amazed.

I've made no secret of trying to get a better handle on my anxiety issues this summer. While a good deal of it is caused by the effects of long-term stress (and yes, even the good stuff. stress is stress.) there is another cause as well. To be completely honest, my weight is probably more a cause of my anxiety than I like to admit. I think yesterday was the first day I was really willing to admit this to myself. I think that by admitting it maybe I'll have an easier time of remembering why I'm doing this.

Last night after we put Andy to bed we went swimming in the pool. While floating around relaxing I shared with Brian what I think about the anxiety/weight connection. That alone took a huge load off! Here's an example . . . I checked my blood pressure after cleaning up after dinner. It was 129/79. I checked it again after my shower following swimming . . . it was 118/59. That's a huge swing!

It looks like we'll be staying in today. Andy has had a cough for weeks and weeks (the doctor poo-pooed it) and today he has buckets of snot. It figures . . . I finally get him signed up for child care at the gym and now he is in no shape to go!

Big Sigh

I really suck at this!

Gee, when I last posted I had promised to go to a WW meeting the next day. Well, my bad. There wasn't a meeting the next morning, I had to go the morning after. Which I did. And I showed a most impressive (NOT) loss of exactly 1/2 pound. Sigh.

But did that spur me on? Absolutely not! Instead, I left for California the next day. I didn't do too badly when I was there, and I think only ate out once. Upon my return last week I got all goofed up on my days and never did make it to a meeting.

During school I complain about never having time for anything. Now I should have the time, but it seems I never do! I don't know what happens to it! I just want time, in the house, completely alone. Even when I think I will have this time, something happens to it. For example, last Thursday I arranged to take Andy to the babysitter at 8:30 in the morning so that I could make it to my 10:00 acupuncture appointment. That meant I should be home by noon and have the entire rest of the day to myself. Sounded like the perfect plan, right? Nope. Brian decided to take the day off. So sure, it was nice getting to spend some alone time with him, but I didn't get the alone time with me.

I just need to figure out how to do stuff when others are in the house demanding of my time and attention.

What do I need this time for? Well, for starters I need to actually read through all my WW stuff. Not that I don't have an idea of what it says, but I need to spend time with it. I have planning to do . . . .

I didn't mean to turn this into a negative rant, but I guess that since I'm here I need to acknowledge it before I can just move on. I'm just so completely disgusted by the fact that I haven't just gotten my shit together over the past few weeks. I only have 3 weeks until the whirlwind of the new school year starts and that just throws me into a panic. I so can't have the kind of year I had last year!

OK, I need to just take a deep breath here. It's almost time for lunch. I need to get dressed (yes, I'm still in my jammies). By then Andy will be awake (I can hear him stirring now) after a way too short nap. Then it's lunch time. He'll have a bottle and some mac and cheese and grapes. I'll have some WW tortellini soup that I made yesterday (just 4 points!). Then we'll run our afternoon errands and hopefully get so exhausted that Andy will nap when we get home and I can have some precious time.

How do you get yourselves started and stay on track?